Saturday, May 3, 2008

In Your Arms I Know I’m Safe. (Boyd's Story)

As he finished getting ready he was in too minds whether he really was doing the right thing or not. It had been nearly ten years now since his wife had left him and even longer since he had been out on a date! That honour went to Jess, the woman he had… ‘been intimate with’ he hated saying it was an affair. That made him sound like an old letch and he hoped he was not that! Since their friendship had ended and Mary left Boyd had not really had time for women, it was not that he did not want to be with somebody or that he was happy it was more a case of he was scared. Scared to death that he would get it all wrong again and he would get hurt once again, maybe he was better off alone? Boyd thought to himself as he sat on the edge of the bed and started to dress, it wasn’t like he was a great catch and he hardly ever had any free time to spare. But then again she must of known that the day she meet him, I mean after all she had seen for herself first hand just what he had to put up with and go though.

As Boyd finished getting ready he could not help but feel nervous and worried, he was like a lovesick teenager! There was no denying he found her attractive and wanted to get closer to him, but after so long would she feel the same way. As he got in his car and took the long drive to where they were to meet his mind drifted back to the day he had meet her. It had been a nasty case he had been dealing with when she first walked into his life, a girl had been abducted and the Police had been contacted but due to various reasons things went wrong and the girl was killed. He always felt like he was to blame for her murder so when, ten years later another girl was taken Boyd wasn’t about to get this one wrong. He drew on his vast experience and knowledge to get the best people working for him and on this case, and that is where she came in! Of all the people he had chosen she was the one he had desperately wanted on his team the most, she was highly respected and he knew if anyone could help him it was her.

Right from the word go they had hit it off and right from the first time he has seen her Boyd had fallen, and fallen hard. It was everything about her, he just could not help it or himself and although they were only ever friends and colleagues he would always wish and hope for more. Boyd just knew deep down inside that if he was to ever find another woman it would be her that could make him happy and make his life right again, he didn’t need anyone to tell him that but when, she had told him he ‘needed a good woman in his life’ he couldn’t help but wish it was herself she talked about. As the car pulled up outside the restaurant Boyd could not help feel the same nervous he had when he asked her for this drink, which soon became dinner! Of course he knew the risks he, well they were both taking! However, after she had stolen his heart so much and knew so much about him how could he ever really let her go? Especially now that he was so close, so close to holding her, touching her, telling her he loved her.

That thought alone scared him; it had been a long time since he had loved anyone let alone told them so. What if she didn’t feel the same way about him? What if she turned him down? How could they ever work together again? Was all that went through his mind as he slowly walked into the bar area and looked around for her, seeing her sat at the bar looking even more stunning that usual. Boyd could feel how hot and sweaty his palms were and as he tried to control his heartbeat and the weak feeling in his legs he slowly took a deep breath and walked over to her side. As he approached he tried to think of what he should say but his mind was completely blank, he had it all work out before he got her but that was then and this is now! Inches away and she turned to face him her deep blue eyes could almost see right through into his soul as she smiled at him, he felt calmed and relaxed. But still unable to speak as his deep brown eyes never left her deep blue ones, they stay like this; just looking into each other’s eyes for ages before she spoke.

“Peter, I thought you weren’t going to make it.” Her soft voice warmed his soul he felt himself blushing as he went to answer her.

“Of course I would be here! Why wouldn’t I?” Trying not to let his nerves and fears show he noted how she was smiling as she spoke.

“Because I know you Peter, I know you find some excuse or other to chicken out!” Smiling he knew she was right, but then again she was always right when it came to him, she always seemed to read him so well. She probably knew how he felt about her but she just wanted him to be a man about it and say something, or maybe she didn’t want to go there because they worked together. And there was his fears and nervousness back again, he would always be unsure about himself at times and although he had very little to be unsure about but there were moments of his life when he just couldn’t help himself. She picked up very quickly on his fears and suggested they have a drink before dinner.

As they sat with their drinks in their hands both relaxed into that comfortable silence both seemed to know so well and although both were happy with this it wasn’t getting either of them anywhere nearer to where they both wanted and needed to be. As the night continued they talked as normal about everything and anything, as they sat down to dinner the same thing occurred and the pair would find comfort in the silence and any conversation but what they wanted and needed to talk about. Deep inside she wanted to say something, every since Mel had died she had known he had feelings for her, but he would never bring it up. It was her he had sought comfort with when he needed it most and it was he she wanted, she had always felt this way about him. Every since she first came to work for him, he was the kind of guy that could restore her faith in men and possible the only man that could love her. When Mel died she had been devastated by it; they all had but while she tried to be the strong one for Boyd and all the team when she needed someone too and the only one she could go to was the one man who needed her most.

As the evening drew to a close both knew they each had to say something or this evening would be lost, forever destined to be just another night out with ‘a friend and colleague.’ While neither wanted to be the first to go down this line of conversation neither wanted the night to be like that. As Boyd walked her back to his car she took a deep breath and spoke.

“You know Peter; I never really say how safe you make me feel. I know we are friends and colleagues, but I have always felt safe and comfortable in your company. I should say that more often.” Taking another deep breath she hoped and prayed he would get the idea and that she hadn’t just made a huge mistake. Smiling slightly, Boyd took a deep breath and said what had been on his mind since they first met.

“I want you to always feel safe with me. I know we are just colleagues and friends, but I have been in love with you since we first met.”

Although he wanted to say more the words got stuck in his throat and he found himself stood silently trying to get the words out as she stopped dead in her tracks and for a few moments was silent, before she continued to walk off to Boyd’s car leaving Boyd where he stood still silent and shocked. All he could thing was he had just done the wrong thing and he was about to screw it all up again, following her to his car and unlocking it they got in and drove off in silence. Oh God what have I done? Was all that went through his mind as they drove off, while all she thought was if she was about to do the right thing by letting any type of loving physical relationship happen between the two of them. Of course she already knew the answer to that one, she loved him just as much as he seemed to love her but of course there would be fears; it was only natural. This would also be the first time she had ever made the first move and if she was honest, even though she knew how he felt about her she was still scared.

As Boyd pulled to a halt outside her house, the fear had reached an all time high and he was about ready to apologise to her and offer his resignation as an apology, turning to face her Boyd sensed she was about to speak; he got in there first.

“Look, I’m sorry if I have said the wrong thing and made you uncomfortable. The last thing I want is to ruin our friendship or working relationship.” As he was about to add he was happy to resign she spoke.

“Peter, I feel the same way about you! I always have. I just needed to make sure I wasn’t about to regret this.” Pausing she noted his confused look and spoke again.

“Peter, I love you and I know I will always feel safe in your arms." Smiling at him she took his hand and moved towards his lips, without stopping to let her nervous kick in she kissed him. Softly and gently upon the lips, she felt how his shock turned into comfort and then desire and he softly and tenderly kissed her back.

Pulling away slightly she felt relaxed in the comfortable silence that fell between them. As he walked her to the door, Boyd hesitated at the door. Wanting to go further but unsure if he should he stood there while she took his hand and kissed him again. As she pulled away from his kiss she went to speak but he shushed her lips with his fingers and gently stroked her lips with his fingertips, smiling at her he all he could do was mumble.

“Oh Gracie.” Softly and quietly, as she took him by the hand and led her into her home both knew what they want and both knew the kiss they had just shared would never end in just a kiss. As they stood in her living room both kissed a true lovers kiss, one that both knew would never end and both knew this was right for both of them. Their love and passion for one another was no long in doubt and no longer would either of them be alone again.

Next morning Grace awoke to the unfamiliar feeling of Boyd’s arm around her waist as she leaned up against his solid naked warm chest, and although he was spooning her she could tell he was awake and smiling. Smiling back she turned slightly and silently looked at this gorgeous man lying next to her.

“Good morning beautiful, did you sleep well baby?” Boyd said as he gently kissed her neck. Moving her head slightly Grace nodded and spoke.

“It was the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a very long time.” As the comfortable silence once again descended upon them, Grace shut her eyes and cuddled further into Boyd’s chest. Moments later the rhythmic beeps of her alarm took both that it was time for work, still smiling both dressed and left for work.

“Do we say anything to the team?” It had been on both of their minds but it was Grace that finally said it. He had known it was coming but he still had no idea how to answer it.

“I am happy to keep quiet if you are.” Ok that wasn’t completely true, if he was honest with himself all Boyd really wanted to do was shout it from the roof tops that he loved this beautiful woman next to him. But he was also well aware that with the team almost falling apart still and the top brass out to get the Unit it may not be ‘that’ easy and God forbid it ever happened but the decision could be taken from his hands. Grace smiled to herself knowing that he wasn’t telling her the complete truth, she knew deep down he wanted to shout it from the roof tops and if she was honest she too herself wanted to do the same!As they pulled up to the Unit they were both still involved in the familiar comfortable silence both knowing neither need to say anymore but both wanting to.

“I don’t feel like we should be hiding our feelings and relationship Peter, we are adults after all.” The moment she walked in all the team would know something was wrong anyway, so why hide from them all Grace thought to herself. Taking her hand in his Boyd sat there silently smiling knowing it was what he had wanted since last night and knowing it was the right thing he took Grace in his arms and kissed her with such passion she could almost feel her heart melting.

“I love you Gracie, I always have. No hiding ok?” Boyd said as they pulled away from each other and got out of the car.“No hiding Peter! I love you too.” Grace answered as the quickly kissed and entered the Unit, arms around each other unsure what their team would think but knowing they both felt safe in each other’s arms.

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