Saturday, May 3, 2008

Untitled Rage... Caged Fury... Painful Hurt.

I am hurt.
I am angry.

I am lost and I am lonely.
I want help finding my way.
Need help finding my way!

Here I sit this nice, kind, caring person.
With heart of gold and friendly nature.
I give all to everyone, and rarely get anything back.
But still I don't mind, still I give all that I have.
No ulterior motives, no underlying reasons.
Just because...

But now the hurt and pain are rife.
Now my heart is dying inside.
I am filled with a rage and anger I have never felt before.
Ready to explode with a violent fury.
The likes of which I have never seen or felt before.
How did this happen and when did it change?
Is this really me and how my life has changed?

I feel wounded now and want to cry.
I long for the time when my tears no longer fall.
I long for the day when I don’t wake up wishing I were dead.
Oh how I long for that day; and the day when I don’t have to fight.
My emotions are no longer my own.
Were they ever mine in the first place?

One moment I can be up; happy and glad.
The next I am down; angry and sad.
Will I ever be free, will the pain ever stop?
How can I fix these feelings inside of me?
Will it really take my death for them to see;
That all I ever need to be was me?

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