Monday, January 18, 2010

Head to Heart by Makeda Bernard....

My wonderful virgin friend (little in joke there, she'll understand) who I have known for a good few years now; posted this on facebook recently, tagging me in it as she did.
I first looked at it and wondered why, then as I began to read it; I understood.
I will share what she wrote and my comment reply... I know people who know me will understand why I am posting, for those of you who don't; please read it as I did... it WILL make you think!!!

Angel is a 19 year old who has the passion for becoming a successful model. I had the pleasure of meeting Angel on the evening of 13th January 2010. Angel has the faith and trust in life like no other person I have so far met.

I met Angel on the way home from work on a bus. I sat down put on my MP3 Player, looking forward to going home and resting in the warmth. Angel was sat facing me, she kept asking the guy beside me “is this was the bus going to London Bridge?” and “what time is it”. The guy didn't pay her any attention and Angel seemed to be on the verge of tears.

I began to strike up a conversation with her. She told me that she was lost and her phone was dead and had been trying to get in touch with her uncle. etc etc, I decided to lend her my phone so that she could make a call.

Whilst she was on the phone, I felt this strong pull. The kind of pull or gut feeling that we normally choose switch off from or ignore...the one where u know really you should do or say something, but begin to rationalize it away in your head and realize it possibly could be a bigger responsibility and burden than you have the resources and ability to deliver

I intuitively knew that some of what she was saying was half truths and it seemed to be more about not wanting the people she had left where she was out of fear. After her calls she gave me my phone back, I felt her energies of worry loss, suicide, babies, freedom, insecure, regret and anguish...

I put my phone back in my bag, put on my MP3 Player trying to relax again, but those feeling just kept going on and on and coming back.... just as I was about to get off the bus I asked her "Is there anything I can do for you?" she replied "I just want someone to talk to" Now I'm sure in a normal persons head that means having a coffee in Starbucks. Nope to me that entailed me inviting her into my home....(does that make me ab-normal?)

At my home she spoke to me about her family and the abuse she suffered, she told me that she was forced into having sex (she was pregnant as a result I’m not sure, will she keep the baby I’m not sure) she spoke of mental abuse...she spoke of having a better life for herself...dreams of being a model

I started making calls to women refuges/hostels the same night. The following morning...lunchtime and afternoon...I had no joy. Angel had stayed with me a night and day. My random act of kindness ended up being an emotional one...the organizations that i called couldn't believe what i had just done......(does that make me ab-normal?)

However as much as they wanted to help and assist Angel and me, they were no places or rooms available. It was getting late and my faith was wearing thin. We had traveled all over London...I knew I may have needed to tell Angel that she would have to go on her way as I had done all that I could and had other commitments, How would she cope? Where would she go? Would she kill herself as she had been threatening earlier? as much as I told myself “she’s not my responsibility”...the sicker I became

I sat and i prayed with the little energy and reserves I had left, then began to make some more calls, just as i was about to give up we had struck gold Angel received a place at women refugee
She was saved...for now.

What would you have done???
followed your head and ignored her, gave her some money, food and wish her all the best and said a prayer for her or opened up your home to her???

(Remember rewards for acts of faith normally occur at the 11th hour, if they occurred at the 1st minute why need to have faith?)

Follow your heart; do as much as possible, treat other how you would have wished to be treated...unconditionally after all Love is not just a word it’s a verb. “God is a verb” R. Buckminster. Love like God is an action verb,

Follow your head and heart; do as much as you can but with the notion that you are called to do your best nothing more or nothing less. The rest is someone else's responsibility namely God. Psalm 82:6 says "I have said, Ye are gods” so ask yourself today and tomorrow what am I doing and what will I be doing?

This experience and my encounter with Angel gave me the inspiration. “Head to Heart” after all life is about as Angel reminded me having a dream bigger than yourself and working towards achieving it, with the right support and people around us we can achieve anything.

Thank you for sharing this with me, means a lot.
I would have said I would have done what I could to help, but have seen that I sometimes don't do enough.
I guess it is easier when you only have yourself to think about ~ I would have anyone and everyone round if I did.

It is (well, always seems to me anyways) harder and full of stress to keep "explaining" to those around me why I am helping or why my folks have come home to find some other waif or stray there...

Of course I want to do more, I want to give all I can to every charity there is. I want to spend all my time helping out others, I want to help those I care about though their struggles.

Sometimes I am selfish, I know that. Sometimes I think that I have no time, no money (which is technically true) etc. Sometimes I think about why should I, or what have they done for me?

I always feel guilty doing so, I know I am not that type of person; I have always been the one that gets hurt, in trouble, or in debt to help out others etc. But it always seems too hard to fight on and be that person, thank you for showing that sometimes it isn't.

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